crushing it

the gym, guys.  it's my jam.  it sounds so cliche but the gym literally saved me.  when Brian started IPAP last august, i had nothing to fill my day besides taking care of the kids and housework.  i had no motivation, no real meaning to my days, and no direction.  sounds so dramatic, i know.  at the time i was still nursing Andrew so i wasn't too concerned about my eating habits or exercise routine. when Andrew was weaned, my diet stayed the same which of course turned into me gaining weight and feeling crummy about myself.  tack on the stress of PA school and i was a mess- emotionally, mentally, physically, spiritually.  the whole shebang.  as my weight crept up i began to become unhappy with myself and told Brian i wanted to join a gym.  i would have loved to be able to save us a gym membership and workout on base but, i need a place that offers childcare.  enter the Y.  i started going to the gym mid February and haven't looked back.  you can find me 5-6 days a week at the gym.  it seriously changed my life.  i am in a much better place now that i work on myself every day.  i take about an hour a day to fully focus on myself and my well being.  Andrew is in great hands with the loving and compassionate teachers at the Y, so it makes it that much easier to give myself the time i need.  i have discovered i am a much better parent and wife when i get my daily workouts in.  plus, i have gained some pretty awesome muscles since my fitness journey began. i can say i am in the best shape i have ever been.  the thing about becoming healthier and in shape, it becomes addictive.  that's where i'm at.  i love going to the gym.  i love the high it gives me after i've crushed my workout for the day.  i love it.  my goals have shifted since i started all this.  at first, it was all about weight and dropping it.  i initially began with running for a minimum thirty minutes a day then a quick twenty to thirty minute strength training session.  now, i focus on lifting instead of cardio.  i do some cardio here and there but my goals are muscles and strength.  i lift for an hour plus each day.  once i begin to see definition in areas, i crave to see more and more.  like i said, i'm addicted.  i've also incorporated yoga into my weekly routine and i'm just as addicted to that as well.  it's been so cool to see how i've improved in flexibility and balance these past months.  i can also tell i'm getting stronger during yoga as well.  first beginning, i was not able to chaturaunga from a plank down to hover into updog.  but now, i can! i'm in full control of it too and not just falling down.  pretty darn cool in my book.
i still have so many goals set for myself that i am actively working toward.  i'm proud of myself.  i have more self confidence than i ever have.  the gym saved me.  saved me from myself.
to health, muscles, and the Y!